Wind in the Palm Trees

Antonio D'Acchille's Masterpiece
Originally uploaded by EdnPHX.

You ever have one of those days where you have enough time on your hands to really look back and reflect on a number of things? For most people, like myself, you don’t get these times often. It seems the world is just running about you at WARP 9 and time always slips away and everything is just so rushed. This morning, I woke up, poured a cup of coffee, and sat out on my patio. It was a gorgeous morning…low 60’s the sun was shining brightly in the morning sky, and there was this eerily calm in the air. The air was crisp from the overnight low temperature, and I could hear the church bells from St. Thomas Church in the distance. (They are praying for me, you know). So there I sat drinking my crème brule coffee just staring blankly at the Royal Palm trees across the street. I had a million things going through my head, all the while trying to digest each item in full detail and color. So here’s a selection of my morning reflections:

Brokeback Mountain: I didn’t cry. But the emotion inside me was there. It was an incredible movie that deserves all of the accolades it has received. The story was very tragic, but emotional and real. I won’t go into too much detail, to save the movie for those who haven’t seen it yet, but I will say it’s a moving love story that I and many people can relate to (Well, not everything, but many parts.). Unfortunately, I saw the movie in a packed, mostly gay crowd. Here’s my thing: going to see a movie with a bunch of queens is almost as bad as seeing a horror flick in inner city ghetto East Cleveland. (I love ghetto black women at a horror flick with comments like “Oh no she did-ent” “Watch out! He gonna get chu!” “Wooo gurl…dats just nasTAY!” ) I was totally annoyed at the queen behind me saying “Oh! Here they go…they're gonna do it! That is so hot!!!” And comments like “God, I want Jake’s ass!”. I turned around twice and shot an evil look, but it did nothing to deter the totally inappropriate comments coming from the sexually deprived queen behind me….and all about the theatre. So, now I’ll have to go see it again to really experience the movie with a mature audience. I mean come on…it’s a serious movie. I do, though highly recommend the movie.

Romance & there lack of it. : Why is romance an unrealistic concept in today’s world? Again, not to bitch, but it seems that the idea of romance is just dead. Sometimes I think I am old school on this topic, but this has really been getting to me lately. Maybe it’s the holidays, maybe not…but do people out there understand that life is more than expensive labels and a quick fuck? I mean, really, think about it. It’s a simple concept, just made complicated by your own perception and barriers. Live to Love, Love to Live. That’s my concept. But alas, finding people with less luggage that a 747 is hard to do. So I plod on….

Home: Just the other day, I came to the distinct realization that Phoenix is now my home. I’ve lived in the Valley now for 2 years and have successfully integrated in to the crazy culture out here. I love it here. Although Cleveland will always be where I am “from”, Phoenix is now my “home”.

Art: The picture on this post is Antonio D’Acchille’s “dalla Realtà al Mito”. This is one of my most favorite pieces of art. I have a small print of this framed in my apartment. This picture brings vivid imagination to me in many ways. It also reminds me of the gallery showing in Cleveland at Brenda Kroos Gallery and the massive amount of wine I drank in 1996. I tried to google the artist to see about purchasing some more art from him, but have been unsuccessful in finding him (Let alone everything is in Italian). What images and emotion do you see in this picture?

Personal Transformation: I have grown a lot in the past 8 months. A friend of mine that I have known for a very long time said to me: “It’s good to see the old Ed back…I though he was gone, but you’re back and better than ever before.” Now that I have moved on from my break-up and realized that I have a lot of living to do, I’ve noticed that I’ve gone through a personal transformation, not just physically but more so on the emotional and personal side. And it’s a good feeling. Although, I’ll never regret my past, it’s good to feel new again and experience life. I’ve seen many people go through personal transformations, but when it happens to you….it just hits you.