What the World needs right now is….

Originally uploaded by EdnPHX.

A Strong Black Woman. That’s right, a bone-fide, straight from the inner city ghetto, all-American, “bitch get out of my way” black woman. (Not to be confused with the pervious post concerning Star Jones, she is an annoying black woman.) What makes me bring this to the blog today? To be honest, it’s all of this news on North Korea, actually. It’s amazing that a little country like North Korea can make such an impact on the political scene. Hurling defunct missiles into the Sea of Japan does make a political splash. Although I have to admit, knowing that they could possibly put nuclear warheads on top of those defunct missiles and potentially send one our way is a bit unnerving. Also, the pictures of the North Korean leader are particularly annoying. He looks like the kid who got beat up at school, and now has a “Dr. Evil from Austin Powers” ego, and now is going to get back at the world for stealing his lunch money. Point in case, the picture on this post.

As to such, I propose that we do an American Idol type search for America’s Strongest Black Woman. Let’s find the biggest, baddest most ghetto diva and send her right over to Pyongyang to bitch slap Kim Jong-il with some big ol’ long duc dong. Now, seriously you know that such a strong woman would not put up with these political games. She’d tell it like it is and tell it straight up! (okaay?) Unfortunately, we have Condi Rice as America’s strong black woman. (I absolutely love the photos on CNN of her, they always show her scowling or in a “pouty pose”)

Although she has the “Don’t fuck with me fellas” look, Condi is a far cry from a strong black woman. Just think of it…we get the top 10 finalists in the Strong Black Woman Idol competition and we send them over to the World’s hot spots in a convoy of Cadillac Escalades with a simple message: “Don’t fuck with us, or will kick your nappy ass.” We’ll even throw in Martha Wash to sing a battle charge as the convoy approaches. There is no escape from the scorn of a strong black woman.

Of course, if the resistance to the Strong Black Woman Convoy fails, well, they you just pissed off 10 Strong Black Women. Now, the convoy turns into 10 Angry Black Women, and well, you just as well should consider the place nuked.

In either case, when you sit back and look at the world, it’s a pretty crazy place. From Iraq to North Korea, from Global Warming to Gas Guzzling SUV’s…..there’s no one single solution. But, throw it a strong black woman and it’ll be much more interesting to watch!