When in Rome or PV....

The liberating square-cut.
Originally uploaded by EdnPHX.

So there you have it, the elusive square-cuts. Yes, the article of clothing that is both sensually enjoyed by many and absolutely feared by others. I have to admit, I think square-cuts look way hot on guys; guys that should actually be wearing them. As for the rest, well…that’s why they made board shorts. Either case, my recent trip to Puerto Vallarta was a truly enjoyable trip, and a “coming out” of sorts. Coming right out of those board shorts and into a pair of (gasp) square-cuts.

The flight down was really great considering I got upgraded to first class. (Got to love America West/US Air Elite program….at least when you get upgraded….of course, when you don’t get upgraded…it’s the absolute worst.) My travel buddies were Chris (The President), Will (The Captain), Velasco (No nick name yet), and Paul (Ambassador of San Francisco). All of us flew down from PHX aside from the Ambassador, who of course flew from SFO. We arrived to wonderful hot and humid weather….perfect beach weather. We stood in line for about 30 minutes waiting to get through Mexican Customs. While in line, I chatted up a couple of older lesbian ladies, who swear by Puerto Vallarta. “You’re going to have such a fabulous time, you boys are!!” The conversation was a sign of gay things to come. We were soon quickly ushered into a van and taken to our hotel, Hotel Mercurio.

Puerto Vallarta is actually quite a nice place. I was expecting it to be more touristy, something like Cancun. But, actually, I was impressed by it’s old town charm, good beaches, and the fact that PV is the GAYEST PLACE IN MEXICO. I like to call it “Castro by The Beach”. There were gay boys everywhere. You couldn’t swing a dead cat without hitting some guy in square cuts or a sarong. (For those of you who don’t know..a sarong is the gayest legitimate article of clothing you can posses. It says “Look at me and how comfortable I am with myself…and no, silly it’s not a skirt!”). The Hotel was adequate for sleeping, stashing your stuff and the occasional continental breakfast. (and of course sex…for those that were able to do that.) It wasn’t the W Hotel by any sorts, but it was close to the beach and the bars.

The beach was wonderful. We anchored ourselves everyday by the Blue Chairs Beach Resort, which is where all the men hang out at. It was crowded, but not so much where it was ridiculous. We got 5 chairs on the beach very easily every day. The crowd of guys were awesome…tons of guys from Canada, Chicago, and other Midwest cities. All of them cruising through their mirrored sunglasses and periodically whispering comments back and forth between each other. (Except for the drunk ones….they were quite obvious and couldn’t care less.) Actually President’s Day weekend is THE weekend to go….it’s got a great mix of guys and isn’t too overcrowded. We drank Mango, Strawberry, and regular Margaritas on the beach and soaked up more cancerous rays of the sun than we could possibly want. I turned slightly red my first day, but it turned to a great tan thereafter. Everywhere you looked there were guys in speedos and square-cuts. I, of course, came unprepared and wore my board shorts the first day. So, I had to do something unthinkable.

The 2nd day, we ran out shopping in the early morning, where my goal was to find a pair of stylish square-cuts. Now, this is a big step for me. It’s not like I’m fat or anything, but I’m not at 3% body fat either. But after one day at the beach I realized that about half the guys were muscle bound hotties and the other half were polar opposite. So, I had a 50/50 chance of being grouped into one of those groups. But then I thought to myself, “Ah, who the fuck cares….when in Rome…” So I bought my first pair of square cuts and felt liberated. All five of us looked quite good at the beach, all sporting stylish square-cuts. And, I got a number of looks as well….good looks, that is. Made me feel good.

The rest of the trip was great. The food, bars, and travel companions were top notch. The Captain was the trip photographer, and I hope to get the official pictures very soon. If you’re debating a trip to PV, I would highly recommend it. Just don’t forget those square-cuts!